If God Only Gives Special Children to Special People, Who Gets the Boys?

On Wednesday afternoon, I was crafting a blog post entitled “Doctor, Heal Thyself”. It was a groundbreaking work that would undoubtedly have propelled my little corner of the blogosphere into the national spotlight, leading to fame, fortune, and a modeling contract for Nathan.

Okay, maybe not. But I WAS writing a post. A serious one. Not this one.

Anywho…Sarah Kate was home sick from school and I was actually relieved that her ailment prevented her from going to PT so I could stay in my pajamas all day devote a little extra time to the blog. Nathan was playing quietly in his room with the door OPEN – I know when I hear the click of the latch that I need to get in there – STAT!

Quietly closing door = doing something bad.

Knowing that his door was open, I had no need to worry. The ideas were flowing faster than my fingers could type – I was on a roll! I hesitated for a second when I detected a whiff of ammonia. Why do I smell ammonia?

Oh, no! NOOOOOO!!!

I leapt from my seat and dashed toward the smell emanating from Nathan’s end of the house. When I saw it, all I could do was yell.

NOOOOOOO!!!!

I happened to have my phone in hand and snapped off a quick shot – because, of course, everyone wants to see photos of horrors like the one I was witnessing at that moment. Let’s break it down.




I righted the diaper pail, replaced the liner and lid, and began cleaning up the mess. Nathan cheerfully grabbed a few dirties and handed them to me.

He’s nothing if not helpful.

I carted him off to the other room and instructed Sarah Kate to watch him until I could get the mess cleaned up (I elected not to share with her any details of the exact nature of the mess or how it came to be). By now the ammonia smell was unmistakable and had permeated roughly three-quarters of the house.

When I returned to rescue my sick daughter from the stench of her diaper-pail-diving younger sibling, she greeted me with:

“What’s that on his face?”


That brilliant, groundbreaking, set-the-world-ablaze post will just have to wait for another day. Poo comes first.

Comments

  1. says

    Some posts about younger kids it’s become harder to relate to but that one- not a teeny bit. Oy gavoy… that photo of him standing there almost incurred an ammonia smell from me! Too funny – sorry at your expense :)

  2. Jennifer Painter says

    No special going on there. Plain and simple – BOY!!!! I’m only a little sorry that I laughed!!

  3. says

    Oh, I love his face! i love that he helped you too – my kids would do that too – here mom, as poo goes flying. Thanks a bunch. Remind me to tell you about the cookie/poo incident the other day…it’s a good one.

  4. Adrienne K says

    Yeah, uhm, sounds like boy to me. :(

    So does this mean that since God gave me 3 boys, I’m special people, too?

    May I share a story? Yesterday at the boys school, I got to meet an adorably baby boy, just 2-3 months old. He stared at me stone-faced. His mom and I were talking about our favorite baby clothes that we have/had for our boys. I told a story about my favorite onesie that happened to be white, and how EVERY time I put WHITE clothes on my baby boys they had poopie BLOWOUTS.

    As soon as I started to talk about poop? Baby Boys stoneface brightened up with the BIGGEST SMILE. And as long as I talked about pooping all over white outfits, the kid SMILED for me.

    They start young. :sigh:

  5. says

    ok, I was laughing from the title. Are we a double dose of special and amazing since we got special boys? You’re a much better mom than me as poop would have had me leaving the house, barricading myself in a nice smelling coffee shop, and waiting for my stomach of steel husband to come home.
    Thank-you for this. Heather

  6. Corinna Wallace says

    omg i had to laugh… sorry about the mess… yuk. But at least you found the time to laugh when it probably made you cry a little at first.

  7. rita rebello says

    with three small boys i have had many momments such as this. no fun and all you can do is laugh at it later. much later.

  8. says

    I can totally relate.

    My 1 y/o’s (girl, BTW) favorite toys are the dirty diapers or her older sister’s potty. She is always grabbing the wipes from our temporary holding basket and wiping her hands and the floor. Or the diaper and, I don’t know, maybe investigating it’s contents? Ensuring that it did come off of her bottom? Deciding if it really was wet or dirty and needed to be changed? Or she’ll go play in the potty and spill the contents onto the floor. Or put it on her head like a hat.

    Yeah … we have lots of baths for that little girl. She’s kept us on her toes.

    And when we discover it (usually because her older sister tells us), we start cleaning up and my older one helps us. She hands us dirty diapers, takes them out of her sister’s hands, etc.

  9. says

    I am so sorry about the mess, but honestly, I could not help but laugh. That Nathan cracks me up. I will tell you, it isn’t just the boys. I apparently did the same thing as a baby (yep, the truth is out). Yuck yuck yuck!

  10. says

    Is it bad that one of my first thoughts was he really must have had some good physical activity! Lots of strength to get all of that done!

    Sorry though. Cute pictures at least.

    • Andi says

      Not bad at all! As hard as his constant movement makes my life sometimes, I don’t mind it. Sarah Kate never had that ability at his age, so I appreciate it even among the poo.

  11. Ann Marie says

    Okay, I’m sorry that this happened to you but your story made my day! Honestly had a great laugh at the story but more importantly your picture captions were hilarious!

    Boys are a special breed unto their own.

    Oh and I love his sweatshirt!

    War Eagle

  12. says

    Andi,
    I hate to tell you, most boys do stuff like that. If it involves a bodily function, boys are going to be in the middle of it.

    Just be glad you don’t have twins who like to finger paint with their poop. (that really happened to a friend of mine)

    Thanks for the great laugh & I hope SK feels better soon!
    ~ashley

  13. Dawn says

    I agree with Ashely. You haven’t arrived as boy mom until they give you your first Poop-caso. The schmear of poo across N’s forehead totally counts.

  14. says

    Been there. We are smack dab in the middle of potty training, and it is happening more and more as my guy gets more aware about things. The other day he pulled poop out of his diaper and handed it to me. Nice. Hang in there!

  15. says

    My condolences! And the condolences of most parents, too, I’m sure. I don’t know what poo’s fascination is for kids, but almost all of them have at least one poo-fest at least one time… my kids had several.

    Heck, I have a series of pictures my mother took of me when I was about Nathan’s age doing much the same thing – except I did it all over the front porch and the postman was the first to discover it.

  16. says

    Crack. Me. Up.

    This is one of my greatest fears… Levi busting into the cloth diaper bin. Thankfully, he’s turned out to be one of those toddlers who hates having “yucky” things on his hands. ha! Case in point: the last few days he’s been pointing to his veins underneath his wrist and saying “wah? wah?” Sorry kid, but those don’t wash off. :)

  17. Jenny says

    Isn’t it fun! And I have two of them. I had to put sleepers or onesies on Mason for a period of time because he was digging poop out of his diapers and decorating his crib with it. He eventually stopped. Not a month later I walked into the boy’s room after their nap and I hear hear Carter say ” Yucky, Mommy”. I was horrified when I turned on the lights. He had completely removed his poopy diaper and it was everywhere – including his forehead :-). Haha! Boys will be boys. Love the pictures!

  18. says

    I was going to write an amazing super witty comment – but I can’t stop laughing. THANK YOU. I am a NEW FOUND SUPER FAN of your blog ;)

  19. mimi says

    ohhh MY! Cracking.Up :)
    i realized its at your expense… so i’ll apologize, and thank you for the laugh at the same time. ;)